In this latest episode of my podcast, The Quiet Currents, I reflect on my own experience of the subtle signs of my autism. My diagnostician likened my case to being “in the Pacific, but within safe reach of the shore.” It was different enough to notice, but not disruptive enough to draw concern.
As a child, at school, teachers saw signs they couldn’t quite place. There were times when I repeated their words, fixated on certain objects, and had trouble with eye contact. I was well-behaved and polite, but often distracted or disengaged during class discussions. My language processing was literal and precise, one thing my diagnostician picked up on when they assessed me.
Socially, I was quiet, but not excluded, yet not fully tuned in. More often than not, I enjoyed my own company, sometimes missing social cues, but never came across as unfriendly to my peers. I, of course, was too young to understand what was going on at the time. However, the way in which I understand it now, subtle autism doesn’t always show as complete withdrawal, but rather as quiet differences that are easy to mistake for personality.
Despite these challenges, I had clear strengths. These included a strong memory, sound mental arithmetic, and musical ability. These strengths, contrasted with my communication difficulties, created a complex profile. It was one that defied easy labels.
Early support made a lasting and important impact. Diagnosis at seven led to teaching strategies that played to my strengths. Visual explanations helped me grasp abstract concepts. Encouragement to explore my interests kept me engaged. Even peers, offering small pieces of social advice, played important roles in helping me in my attempts to navigate the world.
For me subtle autism might not always stand out, but I believe still deserves recognition. With understanding and thoughtful support, people like me can thrive, not despite our differences, but through them.
Have you or someone you know experienced autism in a way that wasn’t obvious to others? I’d be interested in hearing your thoughts or reflections in the comments section below.
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